Sunday, October 17, 2010

Beginning again


So...it's been over two years since I wrote a real post. When I first signed up for this blog, I really had the intention to keep up to date. But then, over the past few years, things got pretty rough. Maybe by not posting about them, I felt like they weren't real. Or maybe I didn't want the world to have access to my business! Of course, the likelihood of anyone actually reading this is probably pretty slim, so why not write about it?

I guess what prompted me to start back today is that I had to have Mulder euthanized on Thursday. When Scully died two years ago, I expected her brothers to outlive her by a decade. But in July, Mulder developed a coordination problem, that led the vet to believe he had some type of neurological disorder. Steroids helped at first, and we decided that once he started going downhill, I would show him mercy. On Wednesday he exhibited difficulty even moving, so the decision was an easy one (relatively speaking.)

Now, this loss of Mulder falls quickly on the heals of my surgery for breast cancer. Yep. You heard me. I was diagnosed with breast cancer on August 27 after having discovered the lump on August 4. More on all that in another post.

This diagnosis of cancer for me falls after a year and a half of walking alongside my mother in her fight against small cell lung cancer, two broken hips, and having to euthanize her dog while she was still in rehab following hip surgery.

Crazy couple of years. Much more than I could have ever anticipated.

My 30's were rough. Going through a divorce, losing my father, and the death of several childhood pets. Also some poor relationship choices. Then I got ordained, which was really good, and I figured that after surviving my tumultuous 30's, my 40's had to be better. Not so much.

So we'll see. Perhaps this blog will be helpful to get some of this stuff out of my head. I just spoke with my friend Dianne last week and she asked if I were writing. I said no. She wondered why not. And so with that, I ask myself. Why not?

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